Alyssa May Margaret

Time for an update! My last post was the day we went in to active labour. Around 6 p.m. on the 10th the contractions became really strong. Ryan made dinner as I was unable to. I had a bath to try and relax and that didn't help. I decided at about 9 p.m. it was time to go to the hospital again. Alyssa interrupted Ryan's plans to play hockey, in true Fabian fashion, as Paul, Alex and I all arrived during dad's squash games I believe (or started mom's labour during them). This time we were admitted to the hospital, when I was in triage being checked out the contractions were so bad that I couldn't talk through them. I promptly asked for an epidural, so as to not miss my "window of opportunity". It was quite scary getting it in, as they explain all the potential complications to you, but once it kicked in I was in heaven :) My OB came to check on me and told us we could expect to have the baby between 6-8 a.m. on the 11th (based on her experience with first time labour and deliveries). Around 4 a.m. on the 11th the epidural started to wear off so I asked for a top up. At 5 a.m. I was fully dialated and ready to push. After 2 hours and 10 minutes of pushing Alyssa arrived at 7:10 a.m. on the 11th (her due date by the way!) weighing in at 8 lbs 4 ozs. The doctor and nurses were shocked she weighed so much, they were all guessing high 6's for her weight. Overall I have to say the labour and delivery wasn't that bad; the recovery has been much harder. The first time the nurses got me up to use the washroom on the 11th I almost fainted, so they had to call in back up nurses and a wheelchair. I think that was due to my low blood pressure and low iron levels. That was a little scary! I had the most wonderful nurses at Southlake. The nurse during the day, Mary Jo, was fantastic. You could tell she was born to be a post natal nurse. She was so good with Alyssa and with me. I keep telling Ryan if we win the lottery soon we are going to hire her to work for us. Our night nurse was a lactation consultant, so that was helpful to get breastfeeding well on the way. I am very lucky to have had no problems with breastfeeding. We were discharged on the 12th in the evening. We had the choice to stay the Saturday night but I wanted the comforts of home, including our shower (if you could only see how tiny the hospital shower was you'd understand!).

Bringing Alyssa home was scary. I was encouraged by my OB and the nurses to top her up with formula so she wouldn't get dehydrated. She didn't like the formula much so we were really concerned she wasn't getting enough fluid. On January 14th we had her first doctor's appointment and she had gained 2 ozs. since leaving the hospital (most lose weight). The doctor was happy Alyssa was so healthy and we were relieved. Since then we were back to the doctor's on the 22nd and Alyssa was up almost a pound in a week. She has had her nights and days mixed up, but we seemed to have solved that (touch wood) with grandma's help. My mom stayed with us this past week and was a big help keeping Alyssa awake during the day, while I napped. We have been so fortunate with friends and family helping out with donations of food; one night over dinner that Rosemary made for us Ryan and I joked we should have babies more often so we wouldn't have to cook!

Some of my insights from the past 16 days:

• The best thing you can do for new parents is feed them! As mentioned above the donations of food, from dinners to snacks (cookies from Aunt Shannon!) have been fantastic
• I cannot believe how many times a day I wash my hands now
• I cannot believe how much laundry such a little human can dirty
• I find it funny that I have no problem being pooped on; yet Alyssa's dirty nose grosses me out
• Poop up the back (along with multiple outfit changes) is a sign diapers are too small. We are now on to size 1. The weight guidelines on the packaging are just that, guidelines.
• Limiting our visitors to mainly immediate family during the first two weeks was the best advice I've ever received (thanks Nikki). It is also easy to tell family that you are having a bad (hormonal) day and don't want visitors.
• Forget what the books say, sleep however you can get sleep, if this means with baby in your arms, so be it. Eventually she'll sleep on her own (we are starting to get a few hours a night with her in the co-sleeper in our bed and soon enough we'll move her over to the bassinet).
• Forget what the books (or others) say and go with your gut. There have been lots of helpful hints in the countless books I've read but nothing compares to mother's (or father's) intuition. One example, Alyssa is a "sucker". I asked the night nurse at the hospital if I could give her a soother (after 3 hours of straight crying in the middle of the night) and you would think that I asked the nurse if I could tape Alyssa's mouth shut. Mother's intuition told me she needed a soother; the nurse objected. Then I asked the day nurse about them and she said by all means - some babies just like sucking and she said she would have duck taped the soother to her 2nd child's mouth if she could have.
• Having an answering machine and a phone with a "do not disturb" function are wonderful. This allows us to not get interrupted if we are sleeping, and people can still leave us messages.
• I cannot believe the number of telemarketers who call trying to pitch RESPs. Do you really think I'm going to invest in our child's future by using some random financial person who calls us? I suppose there must be people out there who do.

I promise to post lots of pictures soon and keep everyone updated. The pictures are currently sitting on our other computer and I'm on my laptop in the living room while I have a moment of peace as Alyssa sleeps in her swing.